On The Fart Barrier

So, today I came across this lovely little video about what it means to be beautifully imperfect. It reminded me of something I vividly remember saying to my wife when we first met: that, young lovers don’t fart and you know that your relationship has turned a corner when it finally goes through the Fart Barrier.

I’m not really much of a poet myself, but in the spirit of those who have inspired me, such as John Hegley and Roger McGough, I even wrote a little poem about it:

The Fart Barrier

Young Lovers don’t fart!
How can you give your heart
After a horse and cart?

Note to US readers: Horse & Cart (also Raspberry tart) is Cockney Rhyming Slang.

I know it’s not a very long poem, but they don’t really have to be do they: remember Oh Wet Pet, the world’s shortest poem? Actually, in honour of John Hegley. I’ll also chuck in the poem I wrote after seeing him perform on one occasion when he encouraged people to write a very short poem with a very long title. So, here is mine:

My Title: What to do at Half Past Two, But See the Glue Drip Out My Shoe

And here is my poem:

What to do
At half past two,
But see the glue drip out my shoe
And watch the heel fall off again.

It definitely works best of you can read it in a Heglarian (new word) style. Anyway, I don’t want to get away from the real subject of this post which has little to do with wind (gas) or poetry, but is about enjoying the pleasures of being beautifully imperfect and learning to enjoy those important people who are around us every day, despite their imperfections.

It may be something of a temptation to think that we can get other people to change, especially when a relationship is new. You can spend your life trying to change your partner, but if you are truly in love with that person, the time will come when you will simply give up. You will come to realise that you just can’t change them and that you actually love them despite their imperfections and actually, they also love you despite yours.

4 thoughts on “On The Fart Barrier

  1. Lauren

    Really enjoyed this article! For years, my husband said, “Women aren’t supposed to fart.” as if women don’t have bodily functions as well as anyone else. I’ve never considered passing gas an imperfection; we all do it. I hope perfection is never the standard by which we judge behavior. In my view perfection means we no longer choose to learn anything new. I pray that I am never perfect. (My father always blamed the dog, btw!)

  2. Ange Wayne

    That is why people are called individuals. In this imperfect world each person has their own flaws. We just need to accept the person as they truly are. I know that the happiest person is imperfect but has been accepted by the people she loves whoever she is. If you have been accepted make sure you do the same for them. We should always remember we reap what we sow.

    By the way young lovers do fart. LOL Cheers!

  3. Shirly Perler

    I would never have guessed reading an article on the topic of “farting” could have such powerful meaning and background. Yet here is some very insightful information that couldn’t be more true. Even today where manners and common courtesy have all but been abandoned by most, passing gas while in the presence of a ‘liked’ or soon to be ‘loved’ one is not commonplace. At-least not until a certain level of trust and comfort has been established. Thanks for one of the strangest but most honest posts I’ve read in some time. Cheers!

  4. LS

    I like the older woman who covers her mouth because she is laughing so.

    When I feel that my husband is being a bit intolerant of my imperfections, I like to say, “it must be wonderful to be so perfect, that you don’t have to forgive others their mistakes in exchange for them forgiving yours.”

    His usual reply is, “It is.” I’m pretty sure he gets what I’m really saying.

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