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I am including this today for the simple reason there are more potential
suicides out there at this moment than at any time in history even more than
the Crash of 1929. For the very simple reason there is far more people
today than then.

Also the people of today all of us my self included do not have the
strength of character of those that came before us.

You may ask what gives me the right to write about this subject. The '
right' comes from twenty two years of living with depression of twenty two
years of sitting with every bit of medication I have in .front of me.

The right comes from taking a 500 bottle of midol, yes Midol in my younger
days after being rejected by a 'lover', from attempting to slice my
wrist and not having the courage or guts if you will to go through with it.

Now what keeps me going is several things the most important being that it
would be my son that would find me and I can not do that to him. Another
thing that keeps me going is knowing that we never know what the next
moment may bring.

The one thing I do know suicide is not the answer it is a last resort to
end the pain and suffering. I have discovered that through using the 'Keys
to the Kingdom' that I have discover and that have been given to me that I
can make 5 more minutes, one more step and one more day.

What do I do when the pull to my drawer of medication takes me? I go to
that drawer and the first thing I see is my son's picture which reminds why
I can not do that to him.

Then I either go for a walk, meditate or pull out a novel and escape into
them or better yet I sit down and write something for someone else to
possibly assist them.

Yes these are all venues of escape, yet I have found that by escaping from
the moment it leaves me alive to live the next moment and have the
opportunity for something wonderful to happen to me or for me.

The numbers above I have used more than once and at one time I even
allowed myself to be admitted to a private psych ward in Anaheim, CA. Nine o'
clock every night we could go out in the rec yard and watch the fireworks from
Disney land a couple of miles away.

Never have I felt so safe and respected. This program was part of the New
Life system and to my sorrow I have no idea if it is still operating. I
hope so for it gave me a start and the ability to know that there is
something better out there.
Somehow I instinctively knew it for the children's mother and I when
something would happen we would take whatever we had and go out and have the
best meal we could afford even if it was only White Castles.

I suppose that what I am saying is that we have to find a reason to keep
living even if it is only to see the next sunrise for by doing that we give
ourselves the opportunity to allow something good into our lives.

Also I have learned that there is good in any situation if we will only
look for it and ask Spirit to revel it to us. Perception is every thing
which I have learned and have to constantly allow Spirit to remind me of it.

Yes, depression is real and is a killer if we allow it. No one can fix us
however we can fix ourselves. If we do not like what we see in the mirror
then it is time for us to change what we see.

We didn't get this messed up over night and it will not be totally fixed
overnight although it is possible if we believe it is. The Change can come
at the moment of realization that there is something better for us and we
can do it. You can do it.

You see I love you and believe in you and until the next time I see you
Peace Isaac OUT.

Blessings
Rev. Isaac
of
the Angelic Messenger Circle
http://www.wisaac3rd.com
wisaac3rd@aol.com
http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/inspiration-spiritual