Hello again. What did you think when you read my introductory article? Were you intrigued? I hope so. I got quite carried away, and enjoyed delving into my love bank. The feedback I received certainly showed that it was an enjoyable read. Of course, I want to cover one type of love at a time, so as not to deluge you with information. Therefore to get started we'll be looking at the most obvious type, which is LOVE OF SELF.
This is the first and foremost feeling of love, that once fully appreciated, will enable us to better understand and enjoy our external loves, that is those feelings we have for others.
Now, I'd like YOU to ask YOURSELF this question, which is better spoken out loud: "Do I love me?"
Depending on your mind and body responses to that question, you will have come up with a number of thoughts, that are with you right now. These words that just sprung into your mind, are based on your in-tuition, and can be trusted.
Let's take a look at how I love ME. This hasn't always been easy for me to do, as I am not as pure as the driven snow. I have a multitude of experiences, that I decided to come to terms with because of conflicts with my values, and the method I used was LOVE. As I recalled the times when I felt 'sad or bad', I chose to adopt a meaning for the action that came before the feeling. What could I possibly learn from such a deed? Such a thought? What has been driving me to continually recall these occasions? These feelings?
I can tell you that the reason these memories kept coming back 'to haunt me', was because deep inside, on a sub-conscious level, I really desired to be free of the baggage. Maybe even 'forgiven'. I didn't realise that taking one simple action would allow me to be free, I once thought I had to clear it up externally! For instance, if I had hurt someone, that I must apologise and make sure they forgave me. Firstly, I am not in charge of other people's feelings, so forgiveness from others is not always granted. Secondly, it's not always possible to apologise face to face, (unless you picture their face in your mind) especially if we are going back a long time!
We CAN forgive and therefore love ourselves, and by applying a meaning to each event, learning the lessons, and loving the initial experiences, we can turn them into positives. This method works for me every time. It has allowed me to be free to experience and love life, with purpose, without baggage and with a whole different energy! Much more joyful, bouncy, vibrant and with bags of vitality.
It might not surprise you that the decisions we make and the actions we take are as a direct result of our inner choice to learn something from the experience. Some people think that on occasion, they have 'made a mistake'. If we recall times when this has seemed the case, what lesson can be applied? Can you recall such instances where you have berated yourself? Maybe still do? Use my simple method of applying a learning curve, and notice the difference.
Another method of loving myself and loving each situation I am in, is BEING GRATEFUL.
Yes, quite simply giving thanks for your challenges, your achievements, your relationships - ALL of them!, and for being YOU. It is extremely powerful, and all you do is say; "Thank you for my partner, thank you for my car, thank you for my job, thank you for the rain", or whatever you are grateful for. Even the things you think you might be better off without! Say this in the mirror to your own face with passion, a few times, and notice the feelings that course through your body. Do the hairs on the back of your arms stand on end? Do you feel near to tears? Is there a fullness about your heart? All this love and much more can be felt, just by acknowledging your thanks! And you are thanking YOU! When I do this, it really gives me the heebie-jeebies!! I get the most intense feeling of happiness, like a concentration of what I normally feel.
Going back to the question "Do I love me?", whatever your response was then, do the exercises above and ask yourself this question again. Is there a difference in the way you feel? Continue to do these simple actions and you will soon know true love of self and great inner happiness.
If you were to ask me what use love of self is, and why make it top of the love-list, I'd answer; "Because once you truly love yourself, you are free to love others with great passion and joy. That when you live with an abundance of love, in a world of love, love is all you see and attract. Your world is a mirror image of who you are, so make sure you are fabulous, and the world will look and feel fabulous too!"
I hope this has been useful to you. Please come back soon, to read my next article on LOVE.
Love as always, to you and yours,
Andrea Nicole Smart
