When I turned 34, I seemed to hit the questioning point in my life. All kinds of questions like do I want to start dating again, do I even want to get married? Do I want to have a baby, and what about my career? As I analyzed the answers it became clear that I needed to make some changes in my life.

Don't misunderstand me; I love men. They're gorgeous works of art that provide countless hours of fun and excitement. But when I'm going it alone, I'm quite happy and in all honesty, I'm at my best. It seems when I have a relationship with a man, I lose a bit of myself and in turn I lose my happiness. Whether that's down to the guy or to me I'm really not sure.

I haven't always felt like this. I started dating when I was 17 and had my first real boyfriend when I was 20. I've always wanted a career and I wanted to get married. Like many women, the plan was college, career, marriage and then two kids. At least the career part of the plan worked out!

Suffice it to say that my dating life has been one Mr. Wrong after another. Wrong for me, not wrong in general. I've tried internet dating, blind dates, the club and bar scene, networking events. Heck, there isn't an avenue that I've left unexplored in my quest to meet a guy.

And even though I had a lot of fun along the way and met some really terrific people, the roller coaster ride of highs and lows was beginning to wear. Yes, youth is about having fun, but as I began to mature, that fun wasn't so much fun anymore; it was more like a noose around my neck.

Somehow adulthood snuck up on me. Given that I was busy growing my career, putting food on the table and paying the bills, it's not surprising that I really didn't notice. But there came a day when it just wasn't cute or funny when my boyfriend came home wasted. Nor was it funny when he sat across the restaurant table from me and flirted with other women.

Reluctantly, I have decided to "throw in the towel", hang up my shoestrings", "retire my jersey", and so on and so on. I have decided to grow old gracefully and single. The good part is that I look forward to not having to share my bed, or possibly deal with someone else's problems. The sad part is that there will be very little or even no more being awakened at 2:00 in the morning for lovemaking. Oh well, thank goodness for the specialty catalogues and AA batteries!

All in all I love myself. No more worries about unfaithful guys or reminders about how pretty I used to be. I have wonderful friends, a great career; in other words, I have a full life as it is. However, that doesn't mean an occasional steamy affair is out of the question! My single days are starting to look better already, at least for the time being.