Now, I would be the first to say that it's not easy – especially if
your self-esteem, self-confidence and self-respect have taken a bit of a
beating. BUT if you can follow the golden rules below, I can guarantee
that you will be a healthier and happier person. You will be in control
of, and have power over, your life.

First and foremost – NEVER GIVE UP. Yes, Life has habit of throwing a
curve ball when we least expect it. And yes, there are times when the
going gets tough. These are the times when your resolve is tested –
and the question you have to ask yourself is this: Can I ride this out
until the going gets better? Because it will get better, believe me.

The second golden rule is an extension of the first: ALWAYS PICK
YOURSELF UP. There will be times when something you set out to do falls
flat. That's when you have a choice: you can either fall down in a
heap and stay there, or you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and
start all over again. And it will be easier the second time around
because now you are armed with the information of what not to do!

The third golden rule is an extension of the second: BE FLEXIBLE.
Never giving up is not the same as being stubborn! If you have a
winner's attitude, you will recognize that there is more than one way
of doing things, more than one solution to a problem. Sometimes, you
just need to be creative. To paraphrase Einstein: You cannot solve a
problem with the same mentality that created it. Flexibility is the
key. Be willing to try other methods.

Which brings me to the next golden rule: ACKNOWLEDGE YOU ARE NOT
PERFECT. Once you do that, you allow yourself to create learning
opportunities without falling in a heap. Here's my challenge to you
– name three people that you consider perfect. Can you do it? I
expect not. The truth is, every person we know has at least one flaw
– and sometimes it's that flaw which endears them to us. The trick
for you is to respect your weaknesses – they are part of what makes
you, you. And if you really don't like a weakness, do something about
it!

When you do do something about it, you will be well on the way to
following the next golden rule, which is: ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR
YOUR LIFE. You created the life you had, have and will have. If you
have a wonderful life, I am sure you could credit someone else for you
being where you are. You've probably heard at least one person say,
"If it wasn't for So-and-So, I wouldn't be/have …."

Technically, this is not true. So-and-So may have offered advice and
helped, but did you have to take them? No, of course not. The fact
that you did, makes YOU responsible not someone else.
The same is true if your life sucks. If you've created the
non-perfect life for yourself, no-one else is to blame – so there's
no point in saying, "If it hadn't been for So-and-So, I could have
done/been ….."

Did you know that only 24% of the population actually take
responsibility for their own lives? The other 76% blame someone else
for their misfortunes.

If you take responsibility for your life then you can SAY GOODBYE TO
FATE AND LUCK. Fate can't be blamed for your learning opportunities
(remember, there is no such thing as mistakes), neither can luck be
responsible for your successes. The blame and kudos are all yours!

Put all these golden rules into a bowl, mix them up, and you will get
the most important golden rule of all: BE A POSITIVE THINKER. It's
next to impossible not to be a positive thinker if you are following all
the above rules. Being a positive thinker is the fuel that powers you
into action and helps you achieve success (in whatever way you define
success). And once you become a positive thinker, fear will no longer
have a place in your life.

Many years ago I cross-stitched a sampler with the words: I think
thinking positively is positively the only way to think.
Yeah!

About the author: Barbara Rose is a mentor, coach, teacher and
alternative therapist who specializes in helping people reach their
potential at all levels (spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical).
Please visit www.barbaras-library.com for a complete list of Barbara's
articles and books. To find out more about Barbara please go to
www.barbara-rose.name.