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Have you played today? Have you felt any loving joy today? Have you felt loved and given attention today? Have you learned anything new today? These are the earliest experiences that our soul craves.
Have you had any alone time today? Have you ever noticed how children will go off to a corner or room to play alone and rehearse ideas? That's important to us, too. This is something that we need for all of our life.
How do others see you? Do you only feel like a fit when you are helpless and others have to do for you, or show you everything? Do you feel like you just can't do anything right? Have you just given up? Do you run your own life, or does everyone else around you, run it for you? Have you just watched someone today to see the way that they do things? We all have role-models or people that we want to emulate in our daily walk. If we follow others around blindly, then we will never find out who we are. Do you sit out when others are having fun, because you don't feel like you fit in? Has that been an ongoing situation in your life? When you know for sure who you are, what you want and what you like and dislike, then you can view a situation and say, "I like this, I think I'll join in", or "I don't think that this is for me", and then just walk away. Knowing who you are helps you to feel more secure around others. You can take them in to your life, or leave them to theirs. You will find that for the most part, relationships with others are transient. They come into our lives, the relationship waxes and wanes, and sometimes they leave our lives. If you can accept this, then you feel less insecure around or betrayed by people.
How do you measure up along side your peers? Do you keep to yourself and do your own thing and not care what others think of you? Do you only feel good by hurting others? Do you think that by not loving anyone that you can not get hurt? This is just plain old emotional revenge on who ever it was that hurt you. You feel the need to retaliate or get even with everyone. This can escalate to violence if left unchecked. This is a very juvenile attitude. We shouldn't overcare, but "lone-wolf" types are usually only lone-wolves because they're licking their inner wounds. Try trusting someone for a change. If that relationship doesn't work out, move on. Their are millions of fish in the sea, and one of them will be the one for you. You can find good friends in unlikely places. I love you enough to write this for you, and I don't even know you, so love is out there, you just have to keep your eyes and heart, open to it.
Are you a drama queen or king? Do you feel like you only belong when you are being noticed? Are you everything to everyone and then complain about how put upon you are? Are your conversations laced with flights of fancy and then later on you're chastising yourself for stretching the truth a little too far? This starts out in early childhood as an attention-getting device. It's a two-edged sword because if it works to get you attention, then you'll keep doing it. Also, if it doesn't work to get you attention, then you'll probably amp up the drama until people have no choice BUT to pay attention, then they will resent that you need THAT much attention. Heard the term "high-maintainence"? If you increasingly escalate the drama in your life, eventually even the most caring of your friends or family is going to say "enough is enough!" and leave you to be the only participant in your own soap opera. They will just be annoyed by further attempts at reminding them of how bad you have it, and by the attempts at coaxing them to get involved.
Do you associate with everyone who greets you, or just "your kind"? Or do you start relationships on a really high note, only to feel as if they have fizzled out when you lose interest in the person and are ready to move on to the next new and exciting person? If we continue to do this, word will get out, and pretty soon no new people will give us a chance.
Do you cooperate with others around you? Or do you have to be in control or the boss, or proving that no one can boss you around? Do you have to feel that you have power? Can you be nice to your coworkers, neighbors, people you regularly meet out in the world? Or do you put your head down and pretend that you are way too busy to be bothered to talk to them. Eventually they will assume that you are way too busy, and just give up. We need to have interaction with others to have experiences that are a reflection to us of who we are, or aren't. If we can be who we are with others around, then we are secure and therefore more confident that we are on the right track. We all know those people who fit in their skin so well that we so wish we could feel that way. Well , the only way to do it is to practice being that way. Others will only get angry with provocations that you are the ultimate authority and all should realize and admit this or pay the price. If you would rather fight than admit that you are wrong, then that's a problem. If you ask for input and cooperation, you'll get it. Be careful, you may run into other "bosses" who want to control you, and the fur will fly!
If we are jerks or just ignore others, we think that this will protect us from them. This is a faulty belief. Our goal is to protect ourself, but what we really do is just isolate ourself.
So, tomorrow, go out into the world with open arms, head and heart and fully experience your own reality. See if you can grow it, or if you need to fine tune some things. If you're one of the lucky few, then your day will be perfectly right for you, and you won't notice anything that you could improve upon or remove.
Until next blog!
Love, Angelia
amsc363@cs.com
gtown.healinghouse@gmail.com
www.worksofheart.bravehost.com
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