Enneagram Type 9 – Mediator/Peacemaker

This personality type wants to create harmony between themselves and the rest of the world. They will suppress their emotions for fear of rocking the boat. They believe that you shouldn’t make waves – you can’t please everyone so why bother even trying.  Their underlying motivation is laziness. They can be resourceful and tend to apply common sense to resolve any problems or issues they come across. You have probably heard someone being described as a “gentle giant” – this would be a perfect description for this personality type.

Once they have mastered their personality type, the positive elements of inner peace and tranquility make them experts at dealing with difficult people. Being even tempered, they do not rise to the bait and hence their presence has a calming influence on most volatile situations. They are able to maintain a healthy detachment thus preventing the need to take sides in an argument.  For this reason they make excellent arbiters.

But mediators can suffer from a lack of self esteem which causes them to dwell on the past. They don’t value themselves or their input to relationships which helps them to justify their underlying motivation of laziness. Their view being: my input isn’t that important so why waste my time and energy putting it across.

In the working world, although very capable at their jobs, they will often avoid getting promoted into positions that involve stress and responsibility. As they wish to avoid conflict at all costs, they will often ignore even a direct question if they know that the answer will upset anyone. They will maintain this silence until the other party either solves the problem or gives up trying. By enforcing silence, they don’t have to cause conflict or deal with the fallout.

So are you a mediator?

  • Do people comment on the fact that you will do anything to avoid an argument, even leaving if necessary?
  • Do you work on the basis that if you keep your thoughts to yourself, you can’t cause an argument?
  • Do people perceive you as easy going whilst inside you may be in turmoil?
  • Do you prefer the simple pleasures in life?

Some tips to help your positive qualities shine through:

  • Try setting some personal goals and impose deadlines by which they must be achieved.
  • Learn to recognize what you want rather than what others want.
  • Using small steps, try making a point of making a decision.
  • When someone asks you a question, think about what you want and admit to it rather than keeping quiet.

Stop doubting yourself and learn to accept and love yourself. You have the ability to move mountains once you maximize the positive aspects of your personality.

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