Here's the goal-setting system that seems to work for everyone who's tried it. It will work with basically any goal you can imagine and in specific, family goals that you can achieve together.

It is a great way to get the whole family working together toward a positive environment. If nothing else, your family will have a great time trying.

1. Dream the goal.

Make a list of everything that you each think you want... all the goals you think you want to achieve. They may involve money, or material things, or better relationships, or a special vacation, or a change in your personal attitudes or habits.

Get some paper and a pen and go somewhere where you can be completely alone and uninterrupted. Write down everything that comes to mind, being careful not to judge or dismiss any of your ideas. Remember that every member of the family should do this as well. You will all compare and agree to compromise on which goals to work toward first etc.

After you have this long list of goals written down, put the list away for a few days. Some of the things you wrote may begin creating a burning energy in your mind.

Review your list in about a week and see which of the goals you're still interested in. Anything that you don't feel strongly about should be removed from the list. Goal setting will not work if you're not really motivated to achieve the goal. Have your family members do the same.

After you identify the goal or goals that you want to work on start writing everything down. A spiral notebook just for your goals might be very helpful. Write down your goal on the first page of your notebook and you can all start formulating them in order of the least to most important.

2. Identify the obstacles that may prevent you from achieving the goal.

After you've set your goal, make a list of things that may threaten the successful achievement of the goal and what you can do to remove those threats.

For example, are you and your spouse or child fighting over some of these goals? Write down ALL the obstacles that you feel may prevent you from reaching your goal.

This is a particularly magical part of goal setting because it takes all of the obstacles that seemed so huge before and reduces them to little letter that form words on a piece of paper. Once the obstacles are clearly defined, they are more often than not, easily solved.

3. Identify the things you need to help you achieve the goal.

After you've identified the obstacles, make a written list of the things you will need in order to achieve your goal.

This list should also include the people whose cooperation can help you work toward your goal. Some of the items on this list may include some things that will represent solutions to the problems you wrote down earlier.

4. Set a date for the achievement of your goal.

Setting a date for the attainment of your goal is the ignition for the goal-seeking missile in your mind. Make sure that your date is realistic... not so soon that it's impossible, but not so delayed that it's not interesting.